To my brothers and sisters who have entered the grace in which you now stand by faith (Romans 5:2), peace to you.
I once shared a story about how Joshua Wang turned legalistic. Today, I want to tell you how my wife and I fell into the same trap. It’s amazing how easily we can stray from trusting in Christ, tempted to build our lives on visible cause-and-effect instead. We often forget that grace is the wellspring of all we have and the power to turn everything upside down. The power of the cross suffices to overturn everything in the world, from stubborn souls to thousand-year empires. If the Lord wills it, everything in His heart is like water in a canal. But like silly monkeys, we often sweat the small stuff while missing the big picture, never learning our lesson.
One day, Joshua asked his mother, “What does it mean to ‘act cute’?” My wife tried to explain, saying it’s about being well-behaved, adorable, and trying to please someone you love. She turned to me, and I frowned, saying, “That’s the definition of legalism! Acting cute doesn’t earn love; people who are loved act cute. Acting cute doesn’t bring security; it’s the product of security.” My wife said, “Joshua, ask your dad again what acting cute is.”
I said, “Acting cute comes from knowing your parents love you.” Joshua, quick as a flash, added, “And God!” I said, “Yes, and God. Because you know God loves you, or because you know your grandparents love you, you act well-behaved and cute.”
Grace is the foundation of childlike affection, not the outcome. It is grace that births security within us. When we feel secure in God’s love, our expressions of affection are pure and grace-filled. Conversely, affection rooted in insecurity becomes a form of self-deception. Within a covenant, acting sweet fosters warmth and connection. But in unhealthy relationships, it devolves into manipulation and exploitation.
Christians who struggle to express childlike affection might be caught in the snares of legalism. They lack trust in God’s unconditional and empowering grace. They hesitate to take even the most obvious leap of faith—like leaving a secure job to pursue work that truly aligns with God’s calling. They fear appearing foolish or incompetent in the world’s eyes, striving to be well-behaved and adorable in God’s eyes.
Conversely, when we take God’s grace for granted, we risk veering into antinomianism—a rejection of all laws and moral restraints. When our displays of affection become a means of testing God’s sovereignty, they degenerate into throwing tantrums.
Seeing the unrest in Egypt recently, I’ve been reflecting on the relationship between rebellion and suppression. Faced with suffering, humanity typically responds with either fight or flight. But neither rebellion nor suppression can create genuine security. A nation filled with insecure rebels and insecure oppressors is a nation teetering on the brink. Only when we first dwell in the security of God’s grace can our acts of resistance be truly transformative. Just as we must first possess inner freedom, our pursuit of external liberty can only be authentic if it flows from that wellspring of grace. I think this is the difference between Christian and non-Christian protesters during times of turmoil in any country.
Another story is about how I was controlled by 360 Security Guard software. A while back, every time I turned on my computer, it would constantly remind me that my boot speed “only beat 23% of computers nationwide.” I admit, my ego received a boost and some vanity sneaked in. So I obediently followed its prompts (the software’s, not a person’s!), repairing, adjusting, and restarting. Until one day, 360 told me that I had “beaten 65% of computers nationwide.” Being comfortably in the middle felt surprisingly good. Subsequently, this ratio continued to rise, giving me the feeling of joining the upper-class, successful people, middle class, elite, or intellectuals. Pride and envy, those sneaky devils, had gotten their hooks in me. I became even more anxious and intolerant of declining ratios.
Please note that it wasn’t slow boot speed that bothered me—it was being slower than others.
One morning during my devotions, this ridiculousness struck me full force. I realized I wasn’t acting like a pastor but like the Evil Queen in “Snow White.” “Mirror, mirror, on the wall, what’s my boot speed percentile among them all? ”
So I prayed, “Lord, I don’t care if my computer boots slower than others; if my phone is fancy; if my clothes are trendy; if my hairstyle is cool; if my income is high; or even if my writing is moving and my ministry is successful. I only care about Your glory; I am intoxicated by Your radiance, which even falls upon my face. I only want to act cute before you, not before Satan. Ever since I believed in Christ’s crucifixion, I’ve realized that I am blessed with a love beyond what the world can offer, despite being a humble and often-useless servant.
Finally, I want to report that Joshua now knows how to act cute, and my computer boot speed only “beats” 3% of computer users nationwide.
May we, together in grace, joyfully await the glory of God (Romans 5:2).
Your brother in Christ,
Wang Yi
February 16, 2011
